So SEX is the answer for most of my problems, huh?

So check this one out! I found the answer to most of my problems..... And I say "most" because it doesn't seem to mention the insanity factor!

But I did email this article to my significant other, btw. Because if it were up to him, I'd have cobwebs by now.

Anyhoo, a little background if you care to be in the know:

Tim and I have been together almost 8 years. Before him, sex was NEVER an interest to me, except in the onset of a new relationship. I didn't know any better. I was married for the first time at 22 and had my first child at 24. I was divorced by the time I was 26 or 27.

Next came husband #2. A real charmer. He should have been a male model, really! During our tumultuous relationship, my Mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. She passed away within months of that diagnosis. It was a very scary time for me. I shudder just thinking about those days of sadness and dread.

So after my Mom died, I married the gorgeous, non-working cheater. Throughout our entire relationship we were both in AA. So I thought. Until one day when I got this reall creepy feeling that something was amiss. I left work and went home at lunch time. To this day I cannot tell you what led me upstairs, into our walk in closet. I began checking his old fireman's uniforms. Old meaning 10 or 11 years old. And that is when I found the empty bottles. DOZENS of them! Since I had been in recovery at this point for 6+ years, I didn't even know what some of those liquors were. For instance, Zima came out after I sobered up. And until today, I have NEVER tasted a flavored Vodka. NEVER!

I lined the bottle up on along the bed and went back to work. Hurt, angry, confused, heartbroken, and so sad. What did I do? I joined in his madness and drinking along side him within 2 months. After all the preaching and crying and begging, my disease won out. So I drank for the next year, month and 18 days (to be exact), stopped drinking and divorced husband #2. Not because he MADE me drink, not because of drinking at all. But once you took away AA, and theee added alcohol, took the alcohol away, we had nothing left. All of our commons practices were now gone. Except the 14 month old, blue eyed, always smiling, light of my life. We had a son. So now I'm divorced TWICE, two boys aged 10 years apart, and scared out of my mind.

Then came my Tim. A biker. Long hair, bandanna, chains, boots, and tatoos on every part of his anatomy that showed, and some parts you'll never see! Everyone in my family, social circles, and even strangers thought I lost my f-ing mind! But I instantly fell in honest to God, true love, that first night we hung out together. It was not the first time I saw him, but I never quite acknowledged him. We were thrown together in situations like oil and water. He stayed on his side of the invisible line for his reasons, and I stayed on my side becasue...well...biker dudes scared the hell out of me.

And then one day we talked. And talked and talked and talked. We didn't officially start seeing each other till weeks later. But imagine my surprise when he recited what I was wearing the very first time he saw me in that first social scene? My heart was bursting, my mind was scrambled, and I was a goner...... He had me, right then and there, without question.

Now, our sex life started off with the usual fireworks you see when you first start sleeping with someone. And those fireworks can still be seen today, only too infrequently for me. After 7 years, I still want him. Always......

On the other hand, he is not the healthiest person. He has epilepsy (under complete control with meds since 2003), he has HepC, treated for over a year, remission and returned. His Dad was diagnosed with cancer December of 2006 and began an awful decline in October. So he does have his excuses mind you.

But I do get annoyed. Why is that? Am I normal? I want sex more than 4 times a month? He makes me feel like I'm a nymphomaniac. Just what I need....ANOTHER label right?

So I began some research about how often, single, married, over 40's engage in sex. And I AM NORMAL IN THAT DEPARTMENT. Gotta be thankful for small favors......

But I did come across this little diddy and thought I'd share it with you. Because maybe you will feel as I do. Most of your ailments, problems, illness and selfconfidence could be restored too!

Check this out!!!!

What are the scientific reasons for having sex?
By Dr Stephen Juan
Published Friday 6th October 2006 11:10 GMT

Sex helps boost the immune system.

According to Dr Carl Charnetski of the Department of Psychology at Wilkes University in Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania, people who reported one or two sexual "episodes" per week enjoyed higher levels of Immunoglobin A. This is an antibody that helps fight disease.

Sex increases longevity.

In one study cited by Dr Charnetski, men who had more orgasms over a 10 year period boosted their longevity compared with those who had fewer.
Sex helps ward off cancer. In another study cited by Dr Charnetski, men who had more ejaculations over a 35 year period had 33 per cent less prostate cancer compared to those with fewer ejaculations.

Sex results in a more youthful appearance.

According to a study by Dr David Weeks, a clinical neuropsychologist at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital in Scotland and co-author of Superyoung (1999), men and women who reported having sex an average of four times per week looked approximately 10 years younger than they really were.

Sex helps reduce stress.

Numerous studies show that it does this through lowering anxiety levels, boosting relaxation, and aiding sleeping.

Sex helps fight depression.

A study by Dr Gordon Gallup of the Department of Psychology at the State University of New York at Albany found that women who regularly engage in heterosexual sex in which they come in contact with semen were significantly less depressed than those women that did not. he causal relationship is unclear. Dr Gallup speculates that "possibly because when absorbed through the vagina, semen may have an effect on mood in women". However, Dr Gallup is quick to point out: "Regardless of the findings, this study does not advocate that people abstain from using condoms. Protecting oneself from an unwanted pregnancy or a sexually transmitted disease is far more important."

Sex helps coping with middle age.

This is the inference drawn from research by Dr GA Bachmann at the Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in New Brunswick, New Jersey and published first in 1995 in the International Journal of Fertility and Menopausal Studies and continuing in The Journal of Sexual Medicine in 2006.

Sex is good exercise.

Exercise helps circulation, lowers cholesterol, and releases helpful endorphins.

Sex helps in losing weight.

Well, at least a little. One burns approximately four to five calories per minute or perhaps 300 calories per hour during sex (depending upon how, shall we say, "vigorous" the sex is). About 7,000 to 8,000 excess calories must be burned to lose one kilogram of fat (3,500 to lose one pound). You do the calculations.

Stephen Juan, Ph.D. is an anthropologist at the University of Sydney.

A response to a readers comment:

As I read bottlecappie’s last comment to me, I thought to myself, “She is so right!” I wasn’t this “bad” when we first met. Well, after considering her comment for a few more days (I looooove to dwell, as other addicts will attest to), I realized that she was correct in saying I seem worse now than when I first found her blog.

You see, I found bottlecappie one day while Googling “Suboxone”. I always Googled the word Suboxone. For the past few years, any “hits” on Google came from sites that were either drug forums or news articles for or against the drug. I did find a few blogs, but nothing worth staying on top of. It was usually from someone who was attempting to blog about their experiences with Sub’s or their addictions alone. But no real “meat and potato” type blogs. You know the kind…..where someone is writing from their heart, their soul, and try to relay their pain, anxieties, fears. The kind of people who share their triumphs as well as their blessings. The kind of blogger that you think you can trust.

Oh, I know that the internet is full of liars and cheats. I know that people can get lured into dysfunctional relationships, and can be conned out of their money and their marriages.

But when you find a poster who shares with their readers their true feelings, if you have anything at all in common with them, and you can relate, you begin trusting their writings much sooner than later. I mean, who would write about being an addict, or being on Suboxone, if they weren’t truly feeling or doing those things. Trust me, non-drug addicts have NO IDEA what Suboxone even is, unless they are dealing with a relationship with an addict who is on Sub’s or getting off of them.


A big plus was that she began blogging from the onset of treatment with SUBOXONE!! That was a big hook for me. But if you don’t believe me, see for yourself. Just head on over to bottlecappie’s blog “Diary of a Quitter” and see for yourself! http://bottlecappie.wordpress.com/feed/

Now, that being said, I can also pretty much assume that bottlecappie and I will never plan for a rendezvous, “just to meet face to face”. I don’t need to see her face to understand her feelings, pain, triumphs or fears. I know them. I live them……

But I began to think to myself, I probably was this depressed when I ventured onto her blog. But you see, she was very new to Suboxone. So I didn’t allow my true lunacy to show. Not because I wanted to “lure” her into my web of deceit. But because I didn’t want to sound like someone who tried to Suboxone, got off the pills, yet still dealt with depression. I wanted to give her the courage, and encouragement to keep going with her treatments. I wanted to be positive, uplifting and somehow convince her that Sub’s were not going to be her worst nightmare. I wanted her believe that she could/would get better…… In doing so, I couldn’t very well go and comment on her blog that I also recovered from pills with Sub’s and now I am just a depressed mess of a nutjob. I needed her to keep positive, to keep forging ahead with her treatments……

So to bottlecappie, I apologize if I was less honest with my feelings. But one thing is definitely true my cyber friend ~~~~ my life IS much better without the oxy’s and with the help of Sub’s. You should have met me before to see the difference! LMAO! My comments on oxy’s or trying to get off of them without Suboxone would have had you running for the hills, trust me at least with that much! ;0)

And without cappie and a chick named "D" that I'd rather not link you to, my life has been much much better, believe it or not. MY blogging and YOUR comments, along with others, keep me going. Sometimes I actually sit there and say, if I could just get to my laptop and blog this insanity, I know I'll feel much better. And I usually do.....

On a lighter note ladies, I'm going to try this again. Just see how much my "times viewed" goes up! Last time I did this labeling, my views rose at least a few hundred!! So, to the pervert Googler's out there, these are for you: